Smoaked Out: The Secret Diary of Felicity Smoak
by gabriel.janas
Summary: It looks like Felicity Smoak has been keeping a secret diary. It's Arrow, as Felicity knows it.
1. Chapter 1-October-24-12

SMOAKED OUT: THE SECRET DIARY OF FELICITY SMOAK

BY: GABRIEL JANAS

Date: October. 24, 2012

It's been quite awhile since I've written in this thing. Sorry Diary! I've been a busy, busy girl. Frankly, there really hasn't been anything interesting happening in my life. Nothing worth writing about at all, until today that is.

I was just sitting around in the I.T. department today, minding my own business-working on schedules, chewing on my pen to pass the time, and routine, boring stuff of that sort- when I heard someone casually stroll in. I figured it was just my annoying department head coming in to pile more work on my desk when a deep and pleasant voice asked, "Felicity Smoak?"

Turning around from my desk with my pen in my mouth I saw that it wasn't my boss. Well…I guess it was my boss…sort of. Standing there in front of me with a small smile on his face was Oliver Queen. Oliver freaking Queen!

"Hi," he casually said to me. "I'm Oliver Queen."

Of course he was. It's no big deal. I'm just a handsome billionaire who returned from the dead after five years and has the whole city wondering how I managed to survive. Now here I am, in your I.T. department, and having never met you before in my life, asking for you by name as you sit there and chew on your pen with a dumb look on your face. No big deal…at…all. God, I wish I wasn't chewing on that pen right then.

To embarrass myself even further I just had to stammer, "Of course…I know who you are…you're Mr. Queen…"

"Noo. Mr. Queen was my father."

As you know fairly well, oh diary of mine, that my brain sometimes does this thing where it causes me to say things without thinking it through fully…or at all. Well…that happened right then…again. On top of my stammering I just had to go and say, "Right. But he's dead…I mean he drowned…but you didn't…which means you can come down to the I.T. department…and listen to me babble. Which will end…in 3…2…1."

Smooth right?

And what does Oliver Queen do? He just stands there, staring at me with those blue eyes of his and a smile on his face for a few moments before he tells me what the hell he is doing there in the first place. Being Oliver Queen he just casually says to me, "I'm having some trouble with my computer and they told me you were the person to come see."

Finally something I'm good at. The whole being social thing and talking to people…bleh. I was never really good at that. But computers are something I could do…unless the computer that is being handed to me just happens to be riddled with bullet holes.

"I was at my coffee shop surfing the web and I spilt a latte on it," he tells me as he tries to look all innocent and charming.

Right. And I'm the new head of Queen Consolidated.

"Really?" I asked him. His story was total b.s., and being me, I just had to call him out on it in the most sarcastic way I knew how, "Because these look like…bullet holes."

"My coffee shop is in a bad neighborhood," he said to me with the practiced innocence of a fat cat always use to smiling his dazzling smile and use to getting his way.

I hate being lied to. But I really can't say no to Oliver Queen…not because he is good looking or anything. I really just don't want to get fired.

Breaking the awkward silence that hung between us he says to me, "If there is anything that you can salvage from it…I would really appreciate it."

Besides the fact that he was a poor liar, at least Oliver Queen wasn't overtly rude. Politeness is a million more times attractive that being good looking or rich…not that I find him attractive…jeez, I'm straying off topic here. Still…I wish he hadn't felt the need to lie to me.

Motioning him to take a seat next to the desk I quickly worked my computer wizardry and got access to the files on the laptop. It was kind of easy as the motherboard and hard drive were still intact. Pulling up the last files accessed onto my desktop screen, I could clearly see that Oliver Queen hadn't been surfing the web…and that this probably wasn't his computer.

"Looks like blueprints," I said to him casually.

"What of?" he asked me just as casually but with a hint of seriousness hidden under his tone.

It was definitely not his computer then. This must be what he came down here for…these files, so I told him, "It's the Exchange building."

"Never heard of it," he said quickly.

"It's where the Unidac auction is scheduled to take place," I said. How could he not know? His stepfather was just trying to acquire the ownership rights to it along with every other big fish in the pond of Starling City's upper echelon…unless he wasn't too fond of the new living arrangement his mother had made after his disappearance. If that was the case then it was something I really didn't want to get involved in. Daddy issues suck, so I figured I'd make that pretty clear…without telling Oliver Queen to get the hell out of the room of course…because I really do love my job.

"I thought…you said that this was your laptop," I stated, easing him into the upcoming warning I could feel aching to burst out of me.

"It is," he replied as he nodded his head vigorously to make me believe it.

Gotcha Mr. Queen.

"Look, I don't want to get in the middle of some Shakespearean family drama thing," I told him as seriously as I could, though I could feel a goofy smile at catching him at his own game playing across my lips.

All he did was look confused…like really confused.

"Mr. Steele marrying your mom?" I probed, "Claudius? Gertrude? Hamlet?"

"I didn't study Shakespeare in any of the four schools that I dropped out of," he said to me still looking confused.

I guess money doesn't buy you everything. Who doesn't know Hamlet? But then again Oliver Queen looks more like the kind of guy who would skip class and play football…basically the kind of guy who would never look at me in high school. Soo, I had to explain it to him.

"Mr. Steele is trying to buy Unidac Industries…and you've got a company laptop with one of the guys he is competing against," I said.

There. Clear as crystal. Felicity Smoak 1, Oliver Queen attempting to ruin his stepfather's bid for Unidac 0.

"Floyd Lawton," he suddenly said.

Who is Floyd Lawton?

"No. Warren Patel," I said to him pointing at my monitor as he looked at me with those piercing, yet confused blue eyes. "Whose Floyd Lawton?"

He was silent for a few moments. As I watched him right then I could see his mind racing and making connections. He really looked as if he had no idea what was going on and that I thought he was trying to ruin Mr. Steele's bid for Unidac Industries just because he didn't like him being his new stepfather. And if that really was the case, I guess it's now Oliver Queen being a mystery and a half 1, and Felicity Smoak guessing right, 0.

"He is…an employee of Mr. Patel's evidently," Oliver Queen said to me after a time.

I just kind of sat there after that and watched him. He looked pretty serious about something and he didn't look like he wanted to tell me anymore. After a few more minutes of silence he took the laptop, thanked me, and practically ran out of the room. He certainly is strange, that one. I guess that's what five years away from civilization would do to you. I honestly wish I knew what was going on. He didn't have to lie to me the entire time. I know how to keep a secret. I guess it doesn't really matter, as I probably won't be seeing him down here again. He used me…and not even in a fun way…and now that he has what he wants he probably won't be back. That's too bad. He had really nice eyes…

As for you, dearest diary of mine, I'm sorry for neglecting you for these past couple of months. I'll try to get better at writing in you…but probably only if something exciting happens again…not that meeting Oliver Queen was really exciting, but it was definitely out of the ordinary. Anyway, thanks for listening to me…even though you're an inanimate object with no sensory perceptions…or feelings of any sort…or even being capable of responding to me in any way, shape or form.

-Love,

Felicity.

5

5 


	2. Chapter 2-October-31-12

Date: October. 24, 2012

What a weird week it's been. I didn't think I'd be writing in you again so soon trusty diary, but there are just something's that I need to write down. Maybe this way they'll start to make sense.

First off, and I don't know why I'm even thinking about him, but there have been no further surprise visits from Oliver Queen. It's not like I expected him to come back since he doesn't even know me, but part of me had hoped he would…which makes no sense whatsoever. It's not like I like the guy or anything…IT'S NOT THAT! I guess it's just the fact that since last I saw him it's been pretty boring down in I.T. …

Today was a little more interesting though! Mr. Steele himself called me up into his office for a private meeting…but it wasn't a "private" meeting…eww, no. He is way too old and so not my type. I was actually kind of scared when he called me upstairs. I was absolutely sure that I was about to get fired. I was so sure that was the case that I stormed into his office in a rage and practically yelled, "I've got one question. Why am I being fired?"

He just sat there all stern and British like in his burgundy sweater and blue collared shirt, leaning back into his leather chair for a few moments before he said, "Ms. Smoak isn't it?"

"Yes," I replied all miffed as I launched into defending myself. "And I am without a doubt the single most valuable member of your technical division, that's including my so-called 'supervisor.' Letting me go would be a major error for this company."

Persuasive right?

"I agree, which is why you're not being fired," he said to me in a tone cooler than ice.

THANK GOD! I honestly hope that the whole 'my so-called supervisor' thing…finger quotes and all… doesn't actually get back to my supervisor. I'll definitely be getting fired then. So what did he call me to his office for if not to fire me you ask? Good question.

"I assumed… that when you brought me up here…it was because…" I said to him as I made a brutal noise that should have sounded like my head getting chopped off. It probably didn't sound anything like what I was going for but he seemed to get the point…and don't judge me ok? I do weird things when I get nervous. You should know that by now! Your pages are full of them!

Anyway, I'm getting off topic. Looking at me then in all seriousness, which seems to happen a lot with members of the Queen family…Steele family? Queen-Steele? Do they hyphenate? Crap! I got off topic again. Mr. Steele looked at me then and said, "It's because I wanted you to look into something for me…a variance of 2.6 million dollars on a failed investment from three years ago that was authorized by my wife. I was hoping you could find out some of the details of the transaction for me."

How he managed to say all of that with such a calm attitude I will never know. 2.6 million may not be a huge amount of money to be missing from the Queen…Steele? Crap! It may not be such a big deal to Mr. Steele, but I would be freaking out if I were suddenly missing that amount from my company accounts. And what did he mean exactly when he said, 'find out some of the details?'

"Find out?" I asked him unsure of what he really wanted me to do.

"Dig up…discreetly," he said gravely.

AH HA! So I guess 2.6 million IS a rather large amount. At least it is large enough that he doesn't want Mrs. Queen…Mrs. Steele? I really need to figure out what they call themselves now… but it must be a significant amount if he doesn't want his wife to know that he has me looking into it.

"I'm your girl," I said to him as I grabbed the file that he handed to me from across the desk and made my way toward the exit. "I mean I'm not your girl…I wasn't making a pass at you…"

That's just another smooth move on my part right? I really need to get a lid on the whole nervous babbling thing that I do…though that will probably never happen…ever.

"Thank you for not firing me!" I called out quickly as I made a mad dash out the exit and to my cubicle down in the I.T. department.

Once I managed to make my way back to my desk I pulled up all of the files on the transaction Mr. Steele had wanted me to look into. Naturally there was nothing there of value. I then mapped out and wrote an automated search algorithm with automated security bypasses and left it running. I figured it would take at least all night so I set up an alert that linked to my tablet and went to get some dinner and a new set of clothes. The whole encounter with Mr. Steele had made me so nervous that I couldn't stop sweating. I had barley gotten into my new outfit at home when my tablet rang to alert me about my program's completion. I called Mr. Steele, who luckily was still in his office back at Queen Consolidated, and told him that I'd be back in about thirty minutes.

As luck would have it my super-genius search program had found something and thirty minutes later I was back in Mr. Steele's office showing him the results.

"The company Mrs. Queen…Steele…Queen-Steele? Does she hyphenate? She seems like a woman who would hyphenate," I said.

What? I had to ask. I couldn't take it anymore! Unfortunately that question remains unanswered. Mr. Steele wouldn't give up the goods. He just stared at me all 'are you serious right now?'

"Right," I said catching on. "The company that she invested in doesn't exist."

"I don't understand," he said.

"There was no investment," I told him. "The money was used to set up and off-shore L.L.C. called Tempest."

"I don't remember that name being under the Queen Consolidated banner," Mr. Steele replied, clearly confused now.

"Because it's not. There is nothing registered with the Secretary of State, no federal tax records, no patent applications filed," I explained. "But in 2009 Tempest purchased a warehouse…in Starling City."

The look of surprise on Mr. Steele's face right then was golden. After a scoop like that there was no way he could fire me. Who else could he find with skills like mine that get him results this fast? As for what Tempest is, I don't think I'll ever get to find out. He gave me a clear dismissal right then with a look as he also reached over the desk to grab the file in my hand. I wasn't about to press the issue and ask either. I like my job way too much. Still…the Queen/Steele family is way too mysterious for my taste…and you know how much I hate mysteries.

Anyhow, it's late. I need to sleep. I've got to be back at work bright and early tomorrow. There really is no rest for the brilliant it seems.

Goodnight diary.

Love,

Felicity.


End file.
